New light is being shed on last week's blaze at King Falls' favorite Muffler Shop, Ernie's Mufflers. Some within the community even have reason to believe this could be an elaborate insurance scam by the absconded owner, Ernie Salcedo, himself.
"You've got a car that, by all definitions, should not run. You've got a local small business that's barely making ends meet, with the owner, from what I've heard, bein' a prime suspect in a murder case and on the lamb. You tell me. Does it look suspicious?" Said Armchair Insurance Investigator Andrew Goetz.
A stolen 1977 Pontiac Trans AM turned into a fireball that Michael Bay would be proud of, when it smashed through the plate glass window of the muffler shop in the early morning hours of the 15th.
"I mean, no workers were there. Nobody was in the car. It's the perfect storm. The reason is there. Nobody was gonna get hurt. This looks less like an 'accident' than my third kid, Teresa!" exclaimed Goetz.
Reagan Spears, an F.B.I. agent working a completely separate case, reached out to The Gazette to see if she could be of service.
"While I'm pleased no one was hurt in the muffler shop blaze, I'm baffled by the fact that the owner, one mister Ernie Salcedo, hasn't been heard from since the attack. I mean, mishap. Don't write attack." Spears noted in a soothing monotone.
All this speculation comes after Jacob Williams was cleared of the possible arson by the King Falls Sheriff's Office. We reached out to Mr. Williams however he could not be located for comment.
In any case, dear readers, please stay away from Ernie's Mufflers as it is an on-going crime scene until further notice. And on a completely unrelated note, if you should happen to run into Mr. Ernie Salcedo, please reach out to Ms. Spears at the Twin Pines Inn.
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King Falls AM was nominated for BEST COMEDY in the 2016 Podcast Awards, is a TOP 75 COMEDY show on iTunes and has just surpassed 800k downloads!
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